


Damaged

by marbie20



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-07
Updated: 2018-08-07
Packaged: 2019-06-23 14:03:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15607878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marbie20/pseuds/marbie20
Summary: Michael and Jeremy have a fight, leading Jeremy to have a panic attack. He confides in Christine. Michael and Jeremy talk through their insecurities and make up. Happy Ending.





	Damaged

Jeremy sat on his bed shaking, tears falling down his face. He couldn’t believe what had just happened. One minute everything was okay and then it wasn’t. Suddenly Michael was yelling at Jeremy and then Jeremy lost it. He ran out of Michael’s house and back to his, only to have a full on panic attack in his room. He didn’t really know what happened. He tried to think back at the conversation.

“Hey, Jeremy, do you want to go play some video games or something?” Michael asked timidly.

Jeremy was texting on his phone, only half listening to Michael. “Huh? Oh yeah, sure.”

Michael drew closer to Jeremy, wrapping his arms around him. “Hey babe, is everything okay?”

Jeremy hid his phone from Michael and turned to face him. “What? Uh yeah, everything is fine.”

Michael crossed his arms. “You’re hiding something from me.” Frustration filled Michael’s usually calm face. “We’re dating now, Jere. You need to communicate with me.” When Jeremy didn’t say anything, Michael huffed, “Who are you texting?”

Jeremy remained silent. Michael felt anger boiling up but tried to keep it down. “Jeremy,” he said slowly, “you’ve been distant for the past few days, barely looking up from your phone. Who are you texting?”

Jeremy looked at the floor, his phone fidgeting in his hand. “It really doesn’t matter,” he muttered.

Michael suddenly yelled, “Jeremy who is it?!”

Jeremy stared at Michael with wide eyes and stuttered out, “…C-Christine.”

Michael’s eyes filled with fire. “Christine?! You’ve been texting her?” He started pacing. “Am I not good enough anymore? Are you leaving me for _her_?”

Jeremy tried to get closer to Michael, to try and calm him down. “No, Mikey, it’s not—"

Michael pushed him away. “Well it doesn’t matter anymore, does it? You’d rather spend time with her than me, obviously. So why don’t you just go?”

“Michael, it’s not…”

“Just go.” When Jeremy didn’t move, Michael yelled, “GO!”

Jeremy felt panic rising in his chest and he ran out the door, tears pricking at his eyes. He had never been so scared of Michael before.

Jeremy sat on his bed, trying to figure out what he did wrong. He loved Michael with everything that he was. He felt his phone vibrate. Christine.

“…hello?” Jeremy stuttered.

“Jeremy? Are you okay?”

Jeremy broke down on the phone. “No, I’m n-not.”

“Jeremy…” Christine’s voice was laced with concern. “What’s wrong?”

“M-Michael. We f-fought…and he y-yelled at m-me. I c-can’t focus. I c-can’t function.”

She paused and then said softly, “Just breathe, okay? Just breathe. What was the fight about?”

He took a deep breath and managed to say without stuttering, “He noticed how I had been on my phone a lot the past couple of days because I was texting you. He asked why I had been texting you and when I didn’t answer he got so angry. Chrissy, he was s-so angry…” A tear fell down his face. “I’ve never been so scared.” He sniffled. “I just miss him. I don’t know what I did wrong.”

Christine paused and then said, “I’m coming over. Hold on.”

About thirty minutes passed and then Christine walked in, climbing in to bed next to Jeremy. She wrapped an arm around him and tried to calm him down.

“Okay, now, are you feeling any better?”

He sniffled. “A little.”

She sighed and closed her eyes. “Jeremy, this is all my fault, I’m so sorry. I never should have burdened you with this, especially if it’s affecting your relationship with Michael.”

Jeremy looked up at her. “I want you to talk to me about these things. I’m your friend.”

Christine smiled. “I know.” She looked down and fiddled with her fingers. “I just…I didn’t know who else to turn to the past couple of days. Things at home have been horrible. My parents are divorcing and my little sister isn’t letting anyone into her thoughts. I’ve been so alone.” She looked at him. “I’m so sorry, you shouldn’t have had to keep it a secret from Michael.”

“B-but it wasn’t my secret to tell. You entrusted me with it and I would never want to betray your trust.”

Christine’s eyes glowed. “You really are the best friend in the world, you know that?” She squeezed his shoulder. “I feel like I need to make this right between you two.”

Jeremy thought about Michael’s anger and started shaking again. Christine just held him tighter.

“Hey, it’s okay. It’ll be okay.”

Jeremy ducked his head into Christine’s shoulder and released a sob he had been holding back.

“W-what if he doesn’t l-l-love me anymore?”

Christine rested her chin in his hair, her eyes closed with sadness. “Oh, honey, he will always love you. This was just a fight.” She raised his chin to look at her. “You can tell him, okay? Tell him what you’ve been talking to me about. So he knows that nothing was going on.”

Jeremy let out a raspy breath. “He thought I was leaving him for you.”

She took a deep breath and ruffled his hair. “Deep down, he knows that’s not true. You’re loyal, always have been, always will. Just tell him, he’ll understand.”

As if on cue, Jeremy’s phone rang. He checked who was calling: Michael. Jeremy looked at Christine.

“I don’t k-know if I can answer.”

She took the phone and answered for him. “Michael? Don’t get upset okay? Jeremy is here with me, he just can’t really answer right now.”

Michael was silent for a second and then she heard him take a shaky breath. “Is…is he okay?”

Christine looked at her best friend with compassion. “He’s…doing better.”

She heard his breath choke up in his throat. “I really hurt him, didn’t I?”

She hesitated before answering. “Yes. But, he knows it’s not your fault. Look, the reason he didn’t tell you he was texting me is because I was going through something and confided in him. He didn’t want to tell anyone because…it wasn’t his secret to tell.”

Michael let a few tears fall down his cheek. “Gosh he’s the best.” He sniffled. “Can I…is he…”

Christine handed the phone to Jeremy. “Are you okay to talk?”

He slowly nodded. He took the phone. “Michael?”

Jeremy heard Michael let out a held breath. “Jere, you’re okay. I am so sorry. I never should have blown up like that at you. It wasn’t your fault. I was insecure and thought that eventually you would get tired of me and go back to Christine.”

Jeremy’s heart rate quickened. “Mikey…I love you. I would never…You are the one I want to be with forever.”

Michael stifled his sobs into his shirt. “I love you so much, Jeremy. I’m so sorry. I know you probably don’t want to see me right now…”

Jeremy looked at Christine and she gave a reassuring nod. “Michael, I want to see you.”

Michael couldn’t contain his relief. “O-okay, um, I’ll come over. Hold on.”

He hung up and Jeremy just sat there, holding the phone. “He’s coming over.”

Christine gently pecked him on the cheek. “That’s good. Are you okay with me leaving? I think you two need some alone time.”

Jeremy slowly nodded. “Yeah, I’m okay.”

Christine squeezed his shoulder and then left. A few minutes later, he heard knocking at the door.

“Jere?”

Jeremy looked up. “Come in.”

Michael slowly opened the door and stood in the opening, looking at his feet. “How…how are you doing, Jere?”

Jeremy pulled his knees to his chest. “I’ve been better.”

Michael squeezed his eyes to stop the tears from rolling down his cheeks, but Jeremy saw. “Mikey, are you okay?”

Michael released a held back sob. He just stood by the door, holding his face in his hands. Jeremy slowly got up and walked over, enveloping Michael in an embrace. Michael wrapped his arms around Jeremy and nuzzled his face in Jeremy’s shoulder.

“I’m s-so sorry I h-hurt you,” Michael sobbed.

Jeremy started shaking as he held Michael. He didn’t know what to say, and couldn’t really say anything. Michael noticed the shaking.

“Jeremy? You’re s-shaking. Do you n-need to sit down?”

Jeremy fell onto the floor with Michael. Michael sat facing Jeremy, trying to read his expression.

“Jere?”

Jeremy looked at Michael and saw the anger previously there was all gone. Now there was only concern and love. Relief flooded through Jeremy and his shoulders slumped, his head falling onto Michael’s shoulder. Michael hugged him, holding him close.

“I’ve never seen you so angry before,” Jeremy muttered. “I was so s-scared.”

Michael cursed himself and gently rubbed Jeremy’s back. “I’m so sorry, baby. I never should have done that to you. You did nothing wrong. That was all on me. You were trying to be a good friend to Christine and I couldn’t see that. I let my insecurities get the best of me and I laid that all on you. I’m sorry.”

Jeremy sniffled and pulled back to look at Michael. He caressed Michael’s cheek. “If something was bothering you, why didn’t you say something?”

Michael took a deep breath. “I didn’t want to tell you because I thought you would get tired of me and leave.” He saw Jeremy’s concerned eyes and chuckled softly. “I know, that was stupid to think.”

Jeremy kissed Michael’s forehead, then moved to his nose, then cheek, and then finally mouth. Michael let himself fall into Jeremy’s embrace and kissed back, breathing in Jeremy’s presence. Jeremy caressed Michael’s cheek and pulled back.

“I love everything about you, Michael.” He looked down. “I was afraid you would get tired of me eventually, with my weekly breakdowns.”

Michael ran his fingers through Jeremy’s hair and Jeremy leaned into Michael’s touch. “I love you so much, Jeremy, and that includes that parts that you don’t like. We’re both damaged but we’re here for each other, right?”

Jeremy nodded. “Always.”

Michael stood up, bringing Jeremy with him. He led Jeremy to the bed and they got comfy together, Jeremy resting his head on Michael’s chest. Michael ran his fingers through Jeremy’s hair.

“I can’t apologize enough for how I treated you, Jere. I understand if you just need some time away from me…”

Jeremy stopped him by kissing him. “I forgive you, Michael. No more apologizing. We’re here for each other, and that’s enough.”

Michael squeezed Jeremy and felt so much love him. Gosh he loved this boy. “Is Christine okay?”

Jeremy nodded. “She said I could tell you…if you want to know.”

Michael sighed. “I don’t need to know. That’s between the two of you. She chose the perfect person to confide in. You’re perfect.”

Jeremy looked up at Michael. “As are you, Mikey.”

Michael leaned down to kiss Jeremy and then they snuggled for the next few hours, eventually falling asleep in each other’s embrace.


End file.
